I started this blog Sunday evening with another work week ahead. Barely a year into my job and I already dread coming to work. Oh dear! There are so many deliverables at work and I guess, no matter what kind of time management hack I do (read: mind mapping, listing down things I should do, putting them in quadrants based on urgency and importance etc..) these all help – but it just couldn’t get all the work done and it frustrates me a bit.
After church yesterday afternoon, we went and ordered pizza and pasta and then went for cake and coffee. The husband and the little boy went to a big toy store and I had my precious alone time there at Ms. Polly’s savoring their delicious yummy chocolate and caramel cake. There, in the middle savoring that delightful slice of cake at around 3:30 p.m. I asked God why I feel so… bland; I asked him why I can’t be like Lukas, so happy and free and excited at the toy store. Something’s amiss and I really cannot put a finger on it. And then in a flash I had an insight. (which usually happens when you ask God a question) It dawned on me that often times my to do lists make me feel hurried and stressed that I forget to enjoy the little things in life. I can be in a lovely place yet, my mind is elsewhere, like cog wheels in a clock moving and turning non-stop like an energizer bunny.
Are you like me?
- I often think of my family’s needs and wants and often push aside what I want
- I often forget to value and treat myself even when I work so darn hard
- My heart tells me often times that I need to slow down and recalibrate my life, my priorities so I can have a better perspective on things (that’s me and I need that) yet, in the name of “productivity” I did not listen and just went on crossing things off my to do list
- I often forget to nurture my heart and honor my wishes because there’s just so many things pulling my time and attention!
and so, here I am, feeling dry and bored and heavy hearted.
In the next few days, I will try harder to restore a little balance and nurture me more so I can love my family and others more. I’ll start by having more quality time, reading good books and meditating on His love and goodness. 🙂 I know happiness is always a choice and it begins when you focus more on the beautiful, respectful and things worthy of praise.
Happy Monday everyone!